Enjoy the Ride

I miss writing!! It's good for the soul, or mine at least, and it clears my mind.

Kiddos are doing well and Tre' and I are trying to keep up with them. They will be turning 2 and 4 this month -- how on earth is that possible?? Izzy is loving preschool and has asked at least a dozen times over break when she gets to go back. Chip is loving trains and cars and anything his sister is doing. He's learning to throw a good tantrum here and there, but is still the more laid-back of the 2 by far. Christmas was wonderful and over much too quickly. Not ready to go back to work tomorrow, that's for sure!!

I've never been very good at New Year's Resolutions, at making or keeping them. So no big resolutions this year... However, I do want to relax a little more, let go a little bit, and worry a lot less. Tre' and I got to go to the Zac Brown Band concert with some friends on New Year's Eve -- had a BLAST! They have this song called, Quiet Your Mind - don't you love that??? The chorus says: Quiet your mind; soak it all in; It's a game you can't win, Enjoy the ride. So, I'm not making any resolutions, but I'm going to try to do those things a bit more. Quiet my mind, soak it all in, and enjoy the ride. Hopefully in doing so, I'll help my kids learn to do the same.

Things I Learned at the Lake

Izzy is growing up way too fast.

So is Chip.

18 month old little boys are insanely busy and share none of their energy with their parents.

Nothing wears my kids out like life at the lake.

Izzy is braver around her friends than she is with just us... wouldn't ride a tube with me, but hopped right on with the big girls.

I could float for hours.

Nothing says "me time" like a napping house, a good book, and being stretched out on a float on a screened porch.

I didn't miss my computer that much even though we were gone for 2 weeks.

Maybe I should try more time unplugged.

Izzy still comes running to me with most news, but occasionally she doesn't and that makes me a wee bit sad...

I'm still sometimes surprised by how much our family has lost in the last 3.5 years. We took a great picture of the kids, Izzy, Chip, and Natalie, piled on Aunt Nik Nik. Love the picture and there are smiles all around. Had to wonder though, what it would have been like with a nearly 8(!) year old Catie and 6 month old Aiden piled on.

I could listen to my kids laugh all day.

Izzy loves nothing more than being around other people.

I hope that Tre' and I raise Iz to think for herself, esp. during her teenage years.

Visits from family and friends sure are nice.

Nothing says, "aaahhhh," like a hot shower after a day at the lake.

Geocaching is fun.

I love vacation, but nothing beats coming home.

Strawberry Pickin'

This is a favorite springtime outing for me! I LOVE strawberries and I love taking the kids. I have to admit that I think Chip ate as much dirt as he did strawberries today! :) He also managed to swallow a few strawberry leaves. My how times have changed from the first baby!!! :)

Tired tonight and counting down the days until school is out (FOUR!!), so I'll let the pictures tell the story...





Couldn't help but add a couple of pics of Catie from the same strawberry patch several years ago. :)

Glimpses

into our day to day life...

Chip tinkled in the tub tonight while standing up. It's the first time he's ever "seen" himself tinkle. He thought it was hilarious!! Oh my goodness!! I laughed so hard!

Did you know that if your child covers herself, and I do mean COVERS herself, in BRIGHT PINK MAKEUP, it might not come off if you scrub her with Dial soap, but a little Shout will do the trick? Yes, I "Shouted it out" (or off) of Izzy!

Little boys can climb up and stand on top of toilet seats before they can walk. They are also fascinated with toilet water and will do anything they can to get to it.

There is no sweeter sound than the laughter of my children -- esp. when one is making the other laugh.

Hearing Little Man say, "Wuv you," absolutely melts my heart.

Painting is a very interesting experience when there are 2 young children in the house.

Little boys learn to make things go VROOM VROOM before they learn to talk and when they do learn to talk, "tractor" and "truck" will come shortly after (if not before) MaMa and DaDa.

Izzy cried longer than Chip when she closed his finger in the door and he had to get stitches.

My kids can turn a tub black with dirt faster than I can sneeze on these gorgeous spring days we've been having. I love it!! (except for the cleaning part)

Brownies after the kids go down taste wonderful.

Izzy enjoys saying "Boston Butt" (with a much higher pitch and great emphasis on the latter word) with a huge grin, b/c we don't usually let her say butt . However, saying that we're having Boston Hiney just doesn't sound very appetizing to me.

Sometimes I'm amazed at the amount of potty talk that I engage in on any given day. A lot of life with little children is all about bodily functions.

I love that Izzy knows that Catie was her sister and Chip's sister too. Lately, she's enjoyed looking at pics of Catie, and I love to hear her laugh at them.

Spring Break

Aaahhhh... I love spring break! We've been busy, but we've been busy on our own terms. And that does not include a 5:30 AM wake up call! Thankfully the kids somehow got that message too and have been sleeping in till at least 7:00 every day (I'm sure I just jinxed myself for tomorrow though).

We've been busy decoating Izzy's room -- we've painted it green (very green), and tomorrow we'll be adding the finishing touches w/ lots of pink, green, and yellow and lots of ribbon. If we can just get the chair rail painted, cut, and hung before the weekend, we'll be set! I can't wait to see the finished product. The only problem is this has totally given me the redecorating bug and I'm already ready to tackle Chip's room next! His room has had classic Pooh in it for nearly 8 years -- could be time for a change! :) It really is amazing what a little paint can do for a room!!

Both kids had well visits today and both are doing well. Chip seems to have some allergy issues as his runny, goopy eyes do not like the pollen! Both kids are off the chart or nearly off for height and weight. They definitely got Tre's height, not mine. Both kids also had to get their finger stuck today. Oh the tears -- esp. from Izzy. Only Chip had to get shots and Izzy cried for him then. She absolutely cannot stand for someone to be hurt or upset (unless of course the 2 of them are after the same toy!). She was very worried for him today when he had to get shots though. My sweet girl...

Here's another favorite Izzy story --

This morning she wanted to build a track for the train and Chip was right in the thick of it and they were both hollering. I told Iz that she could share or put it up and wait until Chip took a nap to play with it. "Ok momma!" she said. There was no change in the hollering and Izzy wasn't making a move, so I said, "Iz, what's your choice?" "You can go ahead and put Chipper down for a nap, Momma." :) Gotta love it!!

Nothing Too Exciting

Whew -- what a weekend! Chip has been one puny boy -- he's really never had a fever before now (unless you count a mild one for a couple of hours about a month ago). He has more than made up for it in the last 3-4 days. High temps of 103 and even above 104 a couple of times. Poor thing -- but he's still good-natured and would even smile some when he felt crummy! He's on an antibiotic, but I think he and Tre' are headed back to the doctor tomorrow morning. We're ready for him to feel better.

Though we didn't get out to enjoy it much since Chip was sick, it was a beautiful weekend! It looks like maybe, just maybe spring is on the way!! I'm so glad we had some good cold (for South GA) weather this winter, but I confess to being ready for spring. I want to get our vegetables in the ground and we need to do some work on Catie's garden. Iz will have fun with all that this year. She's already helped Tre' move a few blueberry bushes that had sprouted up from our other ones. She keeps wanting to know when we can pick them. I think we're going to hit 75 degrees -- bring on the spring!!

Someone asked me the other day what I missed most about Catie... Hmmm... hard question, and one that I don't know that I've ever thought about -- it's hard to pick just one thing. Originally I missed her snuggly self curled up next to me. Then as time passed, and Iz was still really small, I very much missed the conversations we had. She was starting to think and communicate big thoughts before she died and I missed that... still miss that a lot, in fact. Now Iz is starting to think big thoughts and it's fascinating to me to see how they think about such different things. I guess now I just miss her and the way we related to each other. As a mom, each of my kids is sooo different and thus the way we relate to each other is different. None is better than the other, they're all just so very, very different (still amazes me that these 3 kids came from the same parents). But I miss the way Catie and I related to each other b/c it was different than the way Iz and I do and the way Chip and I do... I also miss her giggle and her holding my ear. Lots of other things too, but tonight those are what I miss the most. Still hard to believe it's been 3 years...

Off to get things ready for the week -- counting the days till spring break!!

Busy Boy

When Izzy was the age that Chip is now, we called her Little Izzy Tornado. I think she's officially passed the nickname to her brother. In matter of 2 hours tonight,he spread paper and old mail all over the kitchen floor, got into Vaseline and rubbed it in the carpet (he was hiding behind the couch when he did that), slung a slew of goldfish all over the place, and cleared all the magnets off the dishwasher twice! He's a busy boy and I'm a tired grateful Momma!

Blogging

I really miss writing! It's therapeutic for me. I've always called it good, cheap therapy. Time is just so scarce these days. But... I'm scared I'm going to forget things -- cute think the kids are doing, ways they make me crazy, the laughter, the tantrums... So, I really want to try to write more again. It's really for me -- and for our family. I want my kids to know how things were when they were little. Maybe I can do it if I do little snippets instead of long posts. Who knows!

So... a few quick things for tonight.

Chip's current favorite songs are "Happy and You Know It," "Wheels on the Bus," and "Bippity Boppity Boo." Yes, you read it right -- he loves the Cinderella song and will pat your leg and say, "Bip bop boo," until you start singing it for him. He also knows how to use a wand. We DO have boy toys!! :) He makes mean VROOM VROOM to accompany the pushing around of vehicles. He loves a good wrestling match and I think he could take Izzy out if he tried! Though he has found his (loud) voice and knows how to make his wishes known, he continues to be a truly happy kid with an easy (and awesome sounding) laugh.

Iz is my girl who's full of heart... which tends to bring a bit (ok, a lot) of drama to the house. Whatever she feels (and she feels a lot), she feels strongly. I love the way God knit her together and I stand amazed as I watch her compassion for others and her need to DO to help others when something is wrong. She can talk non-stop for 3 days on end I think!! Her imagination is amazing and lately, she's been trying to get me to speak in her new language. When I do, both she and Chip just cackle.

Dinners out are rare these days for the four of us as it's just easier to be home. :) I'm so thankful for these days even though we (we being Tre' and me) are worn out at the end of them.

Croupy coughs abound from both kiddos tonight... normal kid stuff... Thank you God for normal...

Merrill died tonight... Her family is heavy on my heart. Cancer really is so incredibly unfair. www.caringbridge.org/visit/merrillking

A Good Day

Our portion of MRI -- a few hundred dollars
Parking fees at 2 different facilities -- $14
Co-pays for 3 different docs -- $90
Finding out your kid will be fine -- priceless

So Chip has been having some issues w/ his eyes. If you know much about brain tumors, you know that eye symptoms freak out parents of BT kids. I was fairly sure that Chip's problems were just w/ his eyes, but it was still hard not to worry.

Long story short, we headed to ATL this week for an MRI, to see Dr. Claire, and to see a neuro-opthamologist. The MRI was normal (thank you, thank you, thank you). After learning that, we headed to Piedmont to see the neuro-opthamologist. She agreed w/ us that he was definitely struggling w/ his vision, but she wasn't sure exactly what was going on. She was great and very thoughtful and called a friend of hers, a peds opth. at Scottish Rite. He was very kind and agreed to work us in that day. We met him and he quickly assessed Chip, put some drops in his eyes and said he'd be right back to let us know what was going on. We were surprised at his quick assessment and the impression he already knew what was going on (we'd already seen a doc here locally who was stumped as well). He stepped out for a couple of minutes. Upon coming back in, he looked in Chip's eyes briefly again and then sat back and told us that Chip was going to be fine. He said he has ocular motor apraxia. Basically, he can't track objects with his eyes. While we wish his eyes worked perfectly, this is SO TOTALLY something that we can handle! The problem will improve as he gets older and we are investigating occupational and/or vision therapies.

We are doing well (esp. now!!) and things continue to clip along at a quick pace. The kids are growing, are doing well at the sitter's while I'm teaching, and are, as always, keeping us on our toes!! We love the normalcy that has invaded our lives and we are grateful for it each and every day.

Please pray for our friends, the Maxeys. Their 1st daughter, Maddy, and Catie were in treatment together. They lost Maddy shortly after her 1st birthday. They are now facing extremely tough times w/ their 3rd child (2nd daughter). Please pray for Kirk, Natalie, and big brother Grant, as they take sweet Annette home. www.maxeyweb.com

And Because I Can Never Ge Tired of This...

Chipper!

Ok, so he was laughing a lot harder than this before I put the camera on him. Isn't that the way it usually goes??? :)

What a Great Weekend!

This weekend was absolutely gorgeous!! Our original plan was a great visit w/ my college roommate and her family. But the ickies invaded at her house, so we had to postpone until next month. We were really disappointed, but now we have something to look forward to in May. :)

It turned out to be such a nice weekend. It wasn't perfect (there were meltdowns and Chip hasn't been 100%... it was NORMAL), but it was as close to perfect as you can get. And I loved it too b/c it was peppered w/ Catie moments throughout. Saturday found Iz and I in the yard as Tre' and Chip napped. We watered the new plants in Catie's garden and spent time swinging. That girl LOVES to be outside!!! :) Yesterday afternoon there was a sidewalk chalk arts festival downtown. We headed down there and met some good friends. We checked out the AMAZING drawings on the sidewalk, hit the playground, ordered pizza from a great little joint downtown, and then crashed on the lawn (well.. the adults were getting tired, but the kids were still fully charged!)for an outdoor showing of Finding Nemo. Anyone who's followed us since Catie, knows that she LOVED that movie. We have so many lines from it that we would always say with her that we just love ("You guys made me ink!" and "He touched the butt." and so many more!)... and "just keep swimming, just keep swimming" kind of became our motto w/ all we went through w/ Catie. Neither Tre' nor I had watched the whole movie since Catie died -- I had watched bits and pieces. We didn't make it through the whole movie (Iz was worn out, so we left about halfway through), but I think we did pretty good last night! Iz had a blast and Chip was his usual laid back self (I hope I didn't just jinx myself by typing that!!). It was so great to pal around w/ friends and just have a good time. We also ran into someone who had followed our blog for a long time and told us she had prayed so hard for us... That was pretty neat and meant a lot to Tre' and I that she took the time to stop and say, "hi."

I remember BEFORE... before all this how I loved it when the weather started turning gorgeous like this... It just felt like it could pick you up and carry you along to wonderful places... The year Catie died, I don't even remember spring... nothing about it at all. I remember thinking that I guessed that would just be how it was now... I would never get that pick me up feeling from spring or the first brisk fall night or from blaring music while riding down the road w/ the windows down. I just kind of figured that was gone w/ Catie... that carefree feeling was one of those things that I wouldn't be able to get back. This weekend, though, I tasted it a bit. And it felt. so. good. It doesn't change our longing for Catie... that will NEVER go away, but it's nice to soar a bit on the wings of a beautiful day.

The other thing that was nice about this weekend was the "Catie moments" sprinkled throughout. I've already shared a couple, and it really seems like there were a lot this weekend... However, I will share w/ you the funniest one. The funniest, by far, was tonight when Iz and I were riding the golf cart. Catie LOVED frogs. We still have her "frog stick" (used to nudge the frogs to jump) on our front porch, she ended up calling one of Tre's aunts Aunt Frog and the name still sticks. We have tons of tree frogs around here and they always remind us of Catie. Several have somehow gotten in our house or car since she died, and they love to get on the underside of the doorknob so you get a nice slime when you open it. We had TONS of frog encounters that first spring after she died. They still come, though they are not quite as frequent as then. I kind of think (though I could totally be wrong) that it's kind of God's way of letting Catie send us a hello or an "i'm ok..." Frog and butterfly sightings (esp. when they show up in unusual places or at unusual times) always make us think of Catie. I could so be completely wrong, but it's just funny how they pop up when we need a pick me up. So ANYWAY... Iz and I had run to our neighbors on the golf cart. We were coming back when I saw something small coming towards us through the air. And then THERE. WAS. SOMETHING. SLIMY. ON. MY. FACE!!!!!!! I'm trying not to drive in the ditch while trying to peel whatever in the heck is sliming my face off and then it's gone and I look at Izzy's shoe (and her face -- hahaha) and on her croc is the little green tree frog that totally just landed on my nose. Izzy laughed and laughed and laughed!!!!!!! Good gosh.... I love moments like those. And I love that even though I may be totally wrong about God letting Catie send us a hello, it still makes me feel closer to her.

There were times this weekend that my heart would squeeze and I would think, "Oh I wish Catie were here too." or "Oh this would have been completely perfect if I heard her little giggle mixed w/ Izzy's." But, I guess one of the things I realized this weekend is that a really good day is full of those bittersweet moments that make me miss Catie. That makes my day fuller and makes her feel closer. And, sure, sometimes it makes me sad, but other times... other times I just love her even though she's not here. And, that... is just fine w/ me.

Kiddos

What do you do when you're bored?????


This cereal is GOOD stuff!


Sometimes it's tough being the little brother. How can she want to fix my hair when I don't even have any??????

Whew! Things are rolling along here! Spring break was nice -- we stayed home, got a few things done around the house and just did a lot of relaxin'. That was nice and it felt good to just slow down a bit. We're back in the swing of things again and we're counting down the days till summer!! Only 20 days of school left!! :)

One of the projects we tackled last week was cleaning out the playhouse outside. We haven't been up there much since Catie died, so it was time. I'm glad we went ahead with it for lots of reasons, but most of all because Izzy is enjoying the heck out of it now!!! I think she just loves that it's a little space of her own. She has chalk that she can use to write anywhere up there -- on the walls, the floor -- wherever. She thinks that's pretty cool. We also put a small table and chair set up there. The weather has been absolutely gorgeous here lately, so it's been great play house playin' weather too. I love that she likes it so much up there.

On one of the walls, it somehow still has "Catie was here" and the date written. I wish I could figure out how to preserve that (it's written in chalk on the plywood wall) b/c I love that it's still there.

Izzy is really becoming creative and using her imagination. She can carry on a conversation w/ a wall and her pretend play is becoming more detailed. Yesterday we were playing w/ her doll. She said it was going down the slide. She wanted me to make the doll slide so I lifted the doll up and "slid" her down the imaginary slide. "Weeeeee." Izzy started saying (quite emphatically I might add), "no! no! no! no!" I couldn't figure out what was wrong and then she says, "Momma, you have to make her go up the stairs first!" Oh, silly me! :) Things she's done in the last couple of weeks to remember: Cleared the shoe rack and put all the shoes into a cooler (that still had water in it -- see pictures), covered the great room in Easter grass (pictures in last post), discovered the fun of popping bubbles on bubble wrap, dumped out an entire bottle of bubbles, emptied 3/4 of a bottle of bubble bath on the cover to the toilet (in the 30 seconds she was in the bathroom ahead of me before bath)... We do watch her -- she just moves so fast!! Most of these types of things seem to happen when I can see her, but can't get to her quickly (when I'm feeding Chip). She's definitely into everything right now, but she also continues to grow her tender side... she can't stand it when Chip is upset and will try everything she can think of to pacify him, she's learning to say, "I'm sorry" when it's appropriate, and she continues to give the best hugs and kisses around. If someone looks the slightest bit sad, she's quick to go to them and ask if they're ok. I love that and I hope she is always sensitive to the feelings of others.

Chip continues to grow and grow and grow. He has had an ear infection and a pretty good chest cold here lately. We're doing several breathing treatments a day, but that wheeze still likes to hang on a bit. We're watching him closely. He acts just fine though -- happy as a lark most of the time. He's smiling more and more and he starting to enjoy his toys a bit (he LOVES the ones that hang from the bar on his car seat). He is hilarious trying to find Izzy when she comes in the room and he just grins when he sees her. He's gotten his first taste of cereal in the last couple of weeks and he is loving it!! :) It's amazing how fast and hard you can fall in love w/ such a tiny person!

Easter Pics 2009

His tongue totally cracks me up in this picture!



You can look at her eyes in this one and tell she's been sick.




Iz wasn't very excited about taking pictures.



Big fun w/ the grass from the Easter basket!

Izzy and Her "Buddy"

He's starting to chub up a bit. :)

Chip was a little gassy and Iz got so tickled.


I love this one.