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Sunday, March 8, 2009

I Need to Buy a Book....

and it's called The Strong-willed Child. Oh Ms. Izzy... She is truly, one of the most tender-hearted and empathetic kids I've ever met... esp. at such a young age. But boy oh boy... if she tests us once in a day, she tests us about 472 times. Her current favorite phrase is "Izzy do it!" She truly has me puzzled on exactly how I'm going teach her without breaking her spirit. Sometimes she tests us by not doing what we've told her to do, sometimes it's by doing something she knows she's not supposed to do, sometimes it's when she's in time out and it's lifting her hiney off the chair just a bit when it's supposed to stay flat on the seat, sometimes she does it when given 2 choices and she chooses a completely different one. I believe that consistency is the key, but there are times that consistency can be really exhausting. I also believe that this time is so key in laying the groundwork for the rest of her life. Learning now that "no means no" and that when Tre' or I draw a line that isn't to be crossed we mean it are vital. Learning those things now, I think (and hope and pray) will make for a smoother road through those tenuous teenage years. Here's hoping Tre' and I can be consistent each and every day and that we are making the right decisions in training her up in the way she should go.

It's so interesting to me that her strong will is balanced with the tenderest of hearts for other people. She is a people person in the truest sense and that has been obvious since she was very young. We don't go shopping or anywhere in public that I don't meet someone b/c of her greeting to each person she passes. It cracks me up when I'm pushing her through the grocery store and she passes the guy behind the meat counter and hollers, "How ya doin'?" She is very aware of how others feel and is quick to check on them. If someone is sad, she will walk over to them, place her hand on their shoulder, and ask them, "kay?" for "are you okay?" I am so proud of her for the tender, caring spirit I see growing in her and it does give me comfort as we work to help her grow into a young lady who knows how to listen to her mom and dad.

It's amazing how your children can each be so different and how they each give you different challenges as you work to raise them. I do believe that God created Tre' and I to be the parents of Catie, Izzy, and Chip... and I believe He has uniquely equipped us with just the things we need to do it well. Sometimes it just comes easier than others.


Lisa said...

Oh my, I felt like I was reading my own life only insert my son's name into every time you wrote Izzy! We've never met, but we are sisters in the Lord and I have followed your Caringbridge site and blog. May I recommend a book that has absolutely changed my life, my son's life and our family's life? It's called Raising Your Spirited Child and it even comes with a workbook. Pray about it and see if the Lord would have you check it out. I was afraid I would break my Austin's spirit as well and this book really helped me with that very thing. And by the way, all three of your children are just beautiful.

Margaret Anne said...

Having 3 teenagers now, I had to laugh. I remember being where you are. You're right in thinking consistency will help. And it will help for her to learn now and have a good foundation before she hits her teens! It is hard and VERY time consuming. It takes alot of patience and effort on your part. Hang in there. You've got the right idea. It will be worth it in the long run.

Anonymous said...

I read The Strong-Willed Child with my second son. I had concerns for Andrew because it seemed that I couldn't understand him. I was always the "don't push the envelope" kid; which he did-regularly. He is 15 now and it is exciting to see that same (yet trained) independent spirit, used by God! There is also a book by Katie Fortune called, Discovering Your Child's Motivational Gifts. I wish that I had known about that book when my kids were younger. I think it could have made sense of things to me.
I've lurked on since the Caringbridge days and you and Tre seem like wonderful parents. God will give you just what you need to know with Izzy.
Blessings to you and your little "heritages from the Lord!"

Anne in GA

Pam D said...

Jenny, you and Tre are the perfect parents for Izzy, just as you were for Catie and are for Chip. Seeing all those different personalities helps me to KNOW there is a God; we aren't all clones. The time you're putting in now with Izzy is an investment that no bear market can wipe out, and it will just keep multiplying a hundredfold over the years. I can only imagine what a bright, poised, Proverbs 31 woman she'll be, able to do ALL sorts of things and do them well. It seems as though she looks more and more like Catie as she grows; maybe it's just the pictures, but I see so much of Catie in her face now. I love that!

Dianna in Louisiana said...

Once again Jenny, precious pictures. Ms. Izzy really is a beauty! And Ahhh..... the woes of parenthood, eh! Always second guessing ourselves. This I know for sure..... You will not break Princess (or should I say Queen) Izzy's spirit, but instead mold it and she will use that spirited voice to share the truth with the masses.

Sandy P said...

I have said this a million times, but I think Izzy and Macie are one in the same! I feel a constant battle to teach her whats right and still let her be the crazy little thing she is. And, she is just the sweetest little thing. She says all the time "mommy cuddle me" One of these days we will have to get the two together.